


That time Merlin grew a beard and everyone forgot about self-control

by elletromil



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Asexuality, Crack, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, everyone is together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-24
Updated: 2018-03-24
Packaged: 2019-04-07 10:44:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14079171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elletromil/pseuds/elletromil
Summary: Merlin comes back from a long absence with something different.





	1. Harry

**Author's Note:**

  * For [InsaneRedDragon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneRedDragon/gifts).



> For some reason, I was sure I had already post this one on ao3? But apparently not?
> 
> This is really some pure self-indulgent fluffy polyamory crack because I can and because I wanted to spoil Red a little :)

When Merlin comes back from inspecting the distillery Statesman has acquired for them in Scotland and his subsequent visit to his family, Harry is waiting for him on the tarmac.

It surprises him a bit, though mostly because he hadn’t expected it, when he really should have had. Merlin has waited on Harry to come back from missions for  _decades_ , of course Harry is going to do the same.

It doesn’t matter that it wasn’t really a mission and that he’s coming back to Statesman instead of Kingsman since it’s still being build from he ground up. They have been apart and are now being reunited.

 _This_  is what truly matters.

What truly surprises him however is that as soon as Harry takes a good look at him and he’s close enough to do so, Harry snatches his hand in his and tugs him along without even a single word of greeting.

For a moment, he’s worried something bad happened, right until he’s being shoved into a supply closet and being kissed within an inch of his life, Harry pressed up against him as if he’s trying to climb into his skin.

And maybe he shouldn’t encourage such desperation, but it’s been  _weeks_  since he’s last had his hands on Harry and even longer since he was in any state of mind to do something about it, what with having thought his lover  _dead_  for about a year and then losing both his legs.

He’s still not a hundred percent okay with that last part, but it’s kind of hard to care with Harry kissing him like a nymphomaniac on death row.

It’s only when Harry leans away to take a much needed breath and starts gently rubbing their cheeks together that he finds the usage of his voice again.

“Harry? Not that I mind the enthusiastic welcome, but can I know what prompted it?” Because they’re not twenty anymore and they really should have enough self-control to at least get to a proper bedroom.

“A beard, Merlin, you’ve got a beard!” He moans it like it’s the only explanation required before he dives back into a kiss, his fingers coming up to stroke his face with an obvious attention to said facial hair.

And the thing is, as weird as it is, it makes perfect sense to Merlin that this would be the thing that makes Harry Hart act up like a horny teenager again.


	2. Ginger

Ginger swivels around on her chair to greet him when he steps in the control room and honest to God whimper before she can get a word out of her mouth.

And as if that wasn’t enough to make his brain short-circuit, she’s suddenly out of her chair and pushing him back of the door with a firm finger tapping against his chest.

“No. Nope. Not happening. Not today. Not  _ever_.”

“Oh come Elizabeth!” He usually doesn’t use her name when they are working, but it’s hard to be professional when she isn’t either. “I’ve been cleared for light duty weeks ago!”

He wouldn’t have been sent to Scotland otherwise and it’s unfair that she is trying to stop him from doing his part now that he’s back and in the right mind-space to actually help.

“Oh, I know  _Hamish_ ,” the use of his name is an admonition if he ever heard any, but there is a warmth in her eyes that makes it hard to feel guilty in any way, “I signed the damned paperwork myself. But that’s not why I’m banning you from the control room, or the lab, or, or wherever I happen to be working at any given time.”

“Why then?”

“Because I need to be focused when I work and me wanting to sit on your face and find out how it feels with your beard will make me  _the exact opposite_.”

“Ah…” And the thing is, even if Merlin is far from a prude, Ginger always manages to make him blush somehow and that’s exactly what’s happening now. “That would be reason enough I guess.”

“Yes it would, so now if you could go and distract someone else, Tequila was about to blow himself to bits.”

He can hear the agent protesting the statement through Ginger’s glasses before she closes the door on him and then nothing else as the soundproofing of Statesman’s facility proves true once again.

He’ll never admit it, but he stays standing in front of the door for long minutes after and it’s only Ginger’s text that gets him moving again.

_Go away! But you better not shave until I can focus all my intention on **you**_


	3. Roxy & Eggsy

It’s barely been three days since he’s come back and already, Merlin has seen the interior of more closets than he even knew existed at Statesman.

Had it been anyone else but Harry, he would have wondered how his partner knew about all of them, but finding the perfect place for a snog or a quick fuck has always been one of his ability. Anyway, since he’s stuck at Statesman because of his new responsibilities as Arthur, of course he would have set out to explore his new playing ground. And Merlin has no doubt he’s not the first of his lovers he’s dragged to any of these closets.

On the second day, he also acquired two additional shadows. It served to show that Ro y and Eggsy have really come far since their first day of training, because if it wasn’t for their giggling like schoolgirls, he isn’t sure he would have realised he was being trailed.

It also took him way too long to realise why exactly they were following him around. After Harry and Ginger’s reaction, he really shouldn’t be surprised anymore.

Still, as he makes himself a sandwich on the third day, he wonders if they’ll ever make a move or keep their distance until  he finally decides to shave.

Not that he doesn’t like his beard, but he much more prefers being clean-shaven. As soon as everyone have took their fill, it will go off until he feels like indulging his lovers again.

It turns out, Eggsy and Roxy really have become  _good_  at that whole stealthy thing, because when he turns to sit at the table, they’re already there and Roxy has taken a picture before he can react.

They dissolve into giggles again and Merlin sighs at their antics as he takes place in front of them.

“Was the picture really necessary?”

“Yes!” They both answer at the same time, but only Eggsy actually offers an explanation. “Tilde didn’t believe us, so we promised we would deliver proof.”

Roxy nods in agreement but she’s distracted from saying more when her phone buzzes in her hand. Eggsy leans against her to read over her shoulder and they both start giggling at whatever Merlin is assuming is Tilde’s reply.

“She’s so jealous of us now! And threatening you with a royal pout if you shave before she has the chance to feel it against her breasts.”

Roxy gets a dreamy look at that and Merlin has no doubt she is imagining him doing exactly that to her. And he would have to be a liar if he said he wasn’t interested.

“Maybe it’s because I don’t have tits myself, but I’d rather find out what it feels like against my thighs.”

Roxy moans breathily in agreement and Merlin pushes his plate with his untouched sandwich away from him before standing and offering them his hands after rounding the table.

“Well, no time like the present to find out isn’t it?”

He never thought it would be possible, but after that afternoon, he grows even more fond of the sound of their twin laughter in his ears.


	4. Tequila

Merlin is debriefing Tequila because now that he’s back to pick up the slack, they can send Ginger out on missions. Whiskey probably won’t like being rescued by her, but it’s time he accepts she can take care of herself in the field and she doesn’t need his protection.

Unsurprisingly, Tequila seems as taken with the beard as the others, but unlike them, he hasn’t tried to make a move or anything, focused solely on the debrief.

Not that Merlin expected much different. He might be a bit of wild canon, but he’s very professional when it comes down to it. Add to that the fact that they’ve not really had a chance to spend time together and find out how they can fit, it’s no wonder he hasn’t feel comfortable doing anything about his little fixation yet.

But Tequila’s not exactly shy either, so Merlin is quite ready for his comment as soon as the debrief is over.

“I had heard about the beard, but honestly now that I’m seeing you, I ain’t sure whether I want to be as hot as you or if I want to be  _with_  you.”

From what he knows of Tequila, it’s kind of a big revelation, and not one he’d ever make fun of. But if the other isn’t sure what he wants yet, Merlin isn’t the one who will push.

Though he isn’t above using encouragement and he circles one of his arm with a hand, making sure he’s got his attention before speaking.

“Well Jason, as soon as you figure it out, you should let me know. You know where to find me.” If he had been Harry or Eggsy, he would have ended this with a wink, but instead he simply squeezes his arm gently before letting go.

He’s issued his invitation, he’ll give Jason the time and space to think of it now.

It’s later, much later as he is making his way to his quarters for the evening that he sees Jason again.

He’s waiting in front of his door, looking seconds away from bolting but also simultaneously  _resolved_.

Before Merlin can greet him, Jason whips around, his instincts as sharp as all the other agents Merlin has met. And like all the other agents when spooked, Jason already has his gun in his hand in a move that was nearly too quick to see.

Thankfully, it doesn’t take him long to realise that Merlin is no threat and his gun is back where it belongs before he’s even started to apologize.

“Ah, shit sorry Merlin, I-”

“It’s nothing Jason,” he waves his hand dismissively to show that it’s already forgotten. And it really is, because quite frankly, having a gun pulled on him isn’t exactly new to him, not even when it’s one of his partners holding said gun. “You wanted to see me?” He nods towards his door, in front of which Jason is still standing and the other man hurries out of the way with a sheepish grin to let him open it.

“Ah, yes, Merlin- or… Hamish?” The name sounds alien on his lips and Merlin chuckles good-naturedly.

“Either is fine, I haven’t made a distinction between the two in decades.”

Harry, and now Elizabeth too, usually make a point to use it in certain situations, but it’s all about the relationship he has with them. Not that he thinks any of his other relationship as less important or some such nonsense, but they are  _different_  and born from circumstances that bear no resemblances to each other.

“Erm, okay, Merlin,” he starts again, floundering for a bit before calming down again, “I- What we were talking about earlier, I figured out - I think I actually want to be  _with_ you.

“Good, care to come in then?”

“I- I-  _yes_ ,” he takes a step forward, but stops before actually crossing the threshold. “But first, I want to make sure- You know right? That- that I’m-”

And suddenly, Jason’s earlier behaviour makes all the sense in the world.

“Ace? Yes I know. Or rather, I had gathered from things you and the others have said.”

“And you… don’t mind?”

“Not at all. We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with even if it’s just petting my beard.” He wouldn’t be so adverse to that if he’s being honest with himself. “And not to treat this like I don’t value the trust you’ve just put in me, but even if you wanted more than some intensive spooning, I’m afraid I’m all ‘sexed out’ right now.”

That surprises a laugh from Jason and he has to catch himself on Merlin so he doesn’t fall on the ground in his mirth.

“Yeah, the others seem rather… erm, insatiable lately.”

“Try ‘are being sex fiends’ and you’ll be closer to the truth.”

Jason laughs again and finally follows him inside, allowing Merlin to close the door behind them.

“Spooning sounds nice actually and… I’m curious how it would feel against my throat?” He still sounds a bit hesitant, but he looks like he’s slowly getting his confidence back, if only because he’s the one offering his hand to Merlin before leading them to the couch.

It’s not long before they’ve settled down on their sides, Merlin at Jason’s back, his face hiding in the crook of his neck, their fingers still entwined against Jason’s chest.

He has no doubt that this is how they’ll fall asleep and that his neck will be killing him the next day, but right now, with a warm body relaxing in his arms, he can’t bring himself to care.


	5. Percival

When he had been cleared for light duty and had been allowed to leave the infirmary, Merlin had vowed never to return even if he were to be blown to bits again and lose his arms that time around.

Of course, at the time of his vow, he had kind of forgotten that his partners all had a tendency to end up at medical at least once a month, so it hadn’t taken long before he had had to break it. And even if Richard wouldn’t notice if he had come to visit or not, what with him being in a coma, Merlin couldn’t live with himself if he didn’t go sit by his side whenever he had some free time.

It might surprise people who aren’t in a relationship with him, but he’s a caring lover and he worries easily. There’s nothing he can do to help Richard wake up, but he’ll be damned if he does so alone when Merlin could have been with him.

Anyway, going over reports here is far more productive than if he was anywhere else in the facility. No one interrupts him to ask for his help on things they should be able to take care of by themselves and none of his partners would be so crass as to try and drag him away for a quick (or not so quick) shag. Sometimes, Harry and Eggsy come and sit with him though, because Richard is as important to them as he is to him, but it’s one of the rare instance where they are calm and silent, where they’re just  _there_.

Roxy comes around too, but usually she does so when she’s sure she’ll be alone with Richard and they all respect her need to be.

That’s why when he suddenly hears a raspy whisper he nearly jumps out of his chair from fright, since as far as he knows, there’s no one around that should be speaking right now.

“Guess I died after all.”

It’s not long before he realises that Richard is squinting at him from his bed and he doesn’t really registers what he said until he’s done checking him over to make sure he’s fine and not until he’s brought him some water to sip on.

“Why would you be dead?”

He’s genuinely curious, because all the knights had always made fun of Percival for believing that heaven existed and that would be where he went after death. If an infirmary bed was Richard’s vision of Heaven, he would have to insist on some psych evals once he would be up for it.

“Only an angel could make my Merlin look hotter than he already is.”

Merlin can’t help the pleasant shiver that runs through him at how casually possessive Richard is, even after two months of coma and when he talks to what he believes is an angel.

Gods he’s missed him.

“I assure you, i’m not an angel. I’ve simply grown a beard and you’re on some pretty good drugs.”

“Oh. Really?”

“Yes really,” he confirms and Richard really is out of it because the only other time he’s smiled quite as widely as that without being drugged firsthand is the day him and James got married.

“That means I can touch it, right?” he’s already reaching out, though his coordination is truly shite because his hand pokes his stomach instead.

He chuckles softly as he takes his hand in his to guide it to his face, sighing contentedly when Richard starts lightly stroking at his beard, looking like he truly did find Heaven on Earth.

And as Merlin lets himself finally feel the relief brought by Richard waking up, he thinks that maybe, he’s not so wrong about that.


	6. Jack

Merlin is back in the infirmary the very same day, but this time, instead of going to the private rooms where Richard is staying for the rest of his recovery from being buried alive when Poppy decided to explode Kingsman, he stays in the main area.

After all, dumb agents who get captured because they are too cocky for their own good and break their arm during their rescue because they refuse to listen to their rescuers do not deserve a private room.

Though, in Whiskey’s defence, he couldn’t have guessed Ginger had already disabled the anklet that had been rigged to explode if he was to leave a certain perimeter when she had told him to jump.

Whiskey might need to work on trusting others more, but Ginger will need to learn not to forget about telling important pieces of information in the heat of a mission.

But, proof that he is actually growing as a person, Whiskey has taken the blame this time. He’s even gone as far as saying that if Ginger had been behind her screen he wouldn’t have hesitated and so, it was really his fault for not trusting her as much when she was by his side.

“How are you feeling?” He asks softly as he sits on the plastic chair beside the bed. Others could have been fooled by Jack pretending to be asleep, but there is a small crease in his forehead that means be is thinking over something. That or he is in pain, which would be surprising considering the medical staff never skimp over the good stuff when it comes to painkillers.

“Like I ain’t got a body anymore,” Jack answers without opening his eyes and his pensive frown twists into a displeased pout. Which isn’t surprising only Harry hates losing control more than he does and not feeling one’s body very much falls into the ‘not in control’ category. “But considering the alternative, I’ll take it.”

Merlin rolls his eyes at that, because he knows for a fact that Jack would have refused painkillers if the doctors had left him any choice. Unfortunately for the agent, it’s Statesman’s policy that anyone dumb enough to land in medical got no say about their treatment. And even after being on the same end as Jack of that policy, Merlin rather thinks it would be a good idea to set up something similar once Kingsman will be built back up.

“Ginger’s still angry?” Jack asks after a moment, startling Merlin out of his thoughts about the future of Kingsman.

“No, she isn’t. She accepted your apology remember?” Because that’s one thing he loves about the woman, she never hides what she is feeling, unless it’s for the sake of a mission. “But some idiot set lab thirteen on fire so she’s working out the leftover adrenaline on him.”

Jack sympathetic wince would be more believable if he wasn’t also laughing at the poor sod’s fate, but really Cider is a menace and Merlin nearly wishes he had burned alongside the experiments this afternoon.

“Oh,” the soft gasp makes him forget his murder fantasy and when he looks over, the other man has finally opened his eyes and is, predictably, staring at his face. More precisely, his beard. “So that’s what the fuss is all about.”

He doesn’t ask him who told him about it, because there is only one possible option. Or well, two, but he’s sure Ginger got Harry on the line as soon as she started gushing about Merlin’s beard, if they had not been already having a conference call.

Considering what had transpired during Poppygeddon, many were those who don’t understand how they got along so well, but the truth is, if anyone can understand loss of control, it’s Harry Hart. As for Ginger… Turns out she is most protective of the people who think they are broken beyond repair no matter the reason or how badly they’ve treated her before. At least, as long as they are willing to make an effort and Jack… Jack’s definitely trying now.

“So? What do you think of the new look?”

“It’s… Weird. Somehow it makes you look both softer and more evil at the same time.”

It’s kind of a shock to finally find someone who seems to be immune, but also a bit of a relief. He likes all his lovers, but the attention is starting to get a bit much. Not that Jack is his lover. But he’s finally opening up to more people than just Harry and Ginger and Merlin thinks they have much to learn from each other. It might stay platonic or develop into something more, only time will tell. But since he’s so important to two of the people he holds dear to his heart, he’s important to Merlin too. That’s how he always has been and he doesn’t see it changing anytime soon.

“But you do look more… ruggedly handsome. Which is kind of  _my_  thing, so I feel like I should be jealous.”

Merlin nearly chokes on his own spit before dissolving into laughter, because sure Jack’s handsome, but he doesn’t where he got the ‘ruggedly’ part from.

“Hey! Why are you laughing! It’s true!”

But Jack is laughing too and for once, it’s a genuine laugh and Merlin hopes they’ll get to hear more often.

“Alright, rogue hero – or whatever you fantasize yourself to be in that weird brain of yours – it’s time to sleep.”

He ignores Jack’s pout because nothing would convince him to brave Ginger’s wrath if she found out he had kept her agent from resting like the doctor ordered. But as he pushes himself up from the chair, he leans just close enough to press a kiss on Jack’s forehead, chuckling again when he steps back only to sew the other man looking at him dreamily.

“That was nice…” There’s a beat, then confusion bleeds into Jack’s expression. “Or well, I  _think_  it was… You’ll have to do that again when I’m actually sure of what I’m feeling.”

“I will,” he agrees quickly, with a gentle ruffle of Jack’s hair, “but now sleep. I’ve kept you up longer than I should have.”

Jack nods and he must truly be exhausted because he relaxes into sleep nearly as soon as he closes his eyes, leaving Merlin with the urge to kiss him again.

He doesn’t, not when Jack isn’t awake to stop him if he doesn’t want it, but he satisfies his protective urges by making sure Jack is well tucked-in before he leaves the infirmary for good this time.


	7. Tilde

“I don’t know why I let you convince me to do that,” Merlin grumbles after he makes sure the hotel room he’ll be staying at for the next three days isn’t bugged.

“Because you want to shave for some stupid reason,” is Eggsy’s reply though the comm, which let him know he’s still in route to meet with their informant to retrieve the disk Merlin has been sent to analyze on site.

Though they do need the information as soon as possible, it’s mostly a pretext go get him in Sweden.

“Come on Hamish, it’s not so bad,” Ginger interjects before he can start complaining again. “You don’t have to leave the room at all and over here, productivity has been raised 17% since you left. Champ’s very happy about that even if it means morale is down by 3%.”

“You can’t be serious,” even as he says it, he realises that of course she really would have calculated that.

“I  _am_  serious!” She doesn’t sounds quite as defensive as when someone doubts her word or abilities, but more like she is teasing instead which Merlin doesn’t really mind. Even if he gets the feeling it will all end up being a joke at his expense. “Though the real numbers aren’t quite what I told you. But Harry is an outlier and shouldn’t be taken in consideration. And since his sulking brings my productivity down too, I’ve also taken myself out of the equation.”

“I’m not sulking!” Wherever Harry is, he’s close enough to Ginger that their glasses creates an echo, but for some reason his voice also sounds somehow muffled.

“Says the man hiding his head in my lap,.” He can just picture the way Ginger is rolling her eyes now, but she doesn’t sound mad or anything. Just… exasperatedly fond.

A sentiment Merlin has felt for Harry ever since he’s met the man.

“Tell you what Harry, I’ll make a deal with you. You get started on some paperwork and let Ginger do her own and I won’t shave before I leave from here. Instead, I’ll let you do it for me once I’m back.”

His only answer from Harry is a breathy moan that kind of sounds like a ‘yes’, but that was to be expected. There’s not much Harry loves more than grooming and pampering his lovers and it’s kind of rare that he gets to do more than give his partners a massage or a manicure.

“As long as I get to watch too,” Ginger startles him out of his thoughts suddenly.

“What? Why?”

“Why? Because you’d be trusting Harry with a knife on your throat and that’s-”

“-that’s fucking hot Merlin.” Roxy suddenly cuts in and Merlin starts wondering if the line is secured in any way. Who is gonna be next? Champ? He had been sure only Eggsy and Ginger were supposed to be in contact with him for the duration of his mission. “Tell you what Ginger, you record that for me and I’ll share my video of when Harry did that whole bathing thing with Eggsy.”

“Ah! I knew you were recording that Rox!”

“Like you really care!” You’re the definition of an exhibitionist Eggsy!”

They all start bickering after that, but thankfully, a familiar knock on his door provides him with an excuse to shut off communication with them. Of course, if Ginger really needs to speak with him, she won’t be stopped, but otherwise, she’ll respect his need of privacy.

When he opens the door, Tilde is standing behind, looking as elegant as ever, her face lighting up like a kid on Christmas morning when she takes him in.

“When Eggsy told me he had a surprise, I thought it would be him,” she admits with a delighted giggle as she pushes him back to get into the room, not waiting for him to find the words to invite her in.

“Not too disappointed I hope?”

Tilde looks at him like he’s grown another head or ten before she turns around and gesture at her back.

“Not in the least. Now help me out of my dress and get that beard on my skin! I can’t believe I’m the last one…”

He knows she is not really serious about that last one, but he can’t help but feel an inkling of guilt at her words. He doesn’t say anything, but from the way she completely relaxes into him as he pulls the zipper of her dress down and presses reverent kisses on the back of her neck and shoulders, he doesn’t need to voice his apology for her to hear it.

Soon however, any thought of guilt or regret are chased from their mind by the pleasure of being together again after so long apart.


End file.
